Week 6: the One Thing I Learned This Week in Spain and Italy

{Rome at sunset}

I’m halfway there, you guys. And not halfway there in the way that you are in a marathon or a math class, when you’re counting down the miles or minutes until freedom, but halfway there as you are with a really good meal, when you look down at your food, willing it with your eyes to last longer. (It never does.)

I’m six weeks in and at this point, I have six left to go. It’s weird, being at this crossroads. I know what I want to do differently, but I don’t know how. I know I’m looking forward to seeing about four more cities, celebrating my twentieth birthday, and hopefully starting some new books. But beyond that, I’m not sure what to make of the time that has passed and the time I have left.

{sunlight through stained glass}

I know I’ve learned a lot. These weekly posts have forced me to reflect upon and then consequently chronicle just that. And I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on my own as well, in the safety of my on head or journal or private conversations with friends. When I started, I thought by now, at this halfway point, time would have flown, and it did. But the weird thing is, I simultaneously feel like I’ve done so much that there’s nothing left to do, and yet, that I have so much left to do and not enough time.

And as weird as it is to admit on such a public space, it feels like I’m missing something. I was sitting in Plaza Mayor one evening with a friend and some American tourists walked in and the mom looked around and said, “That’s it?” It was funny then, and still is now, because that’s such an accurate representation of how I’ve been feeling. This is it? Instead of posting my usual weekly bulleted list, I’m just going to say this, that my life isn’t as glorious as it looks on Instagram or on this blog or whatever, wherever. Nobody’s is. I’m hot and sweaty and complaining half the time, and I’m not trying to pretend that it’s any other way. Don’t get me wrong, I know how incredibly cool it is to be here where I am right now, to have these opportunities to do what I’m doing. And I’m grateful for that, truly. But I think halfway through is a good time to focus on reality, to take off those rose-tinted tourist glasses and just stop and take Madrid for what it is: another city, another home.

{Barcelona}

For the remainder of my time, I'm going to look at Madrid as this home instead of just another new place to explore before crossing off some imaginary bucket list. I'm going to appreciate the food and the places and the people, just like I do in D.C., and I'm going to take advantage of what's offered to me as best as I can. I'm going to enjoy the last few weeks of summer and freedom and appreciate it all. After all, I've only got six weeks left.

~ V

{peacock in Madrid}

Read also: Week 1, Week 2, Week 3, Week 4, Week 5

Thoughts on travel

{Roman sunset}

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to travel. Maybe that’s just what happens when you’re born in one place but live in three, all spanning across different continents, by the time you even turn three. I’ve lived in Mumbai, Nigeria, Houston, New Jersey, D.C., and now Madrid; had my family or I chosen to stay in either of these places longer than we did, my life would have gone in so many different directions. Who would I have been if I hadn’t met my best friends or lived near the family that I am so close to? If I hadn’t met the people who introduced me to Kurt Vonnegut or Kanye West lyrics or The Office? I think the one of the many, many reasons I travel is to compensate for that. My life could have been drastically different and I’m grateful for every place I’ve been to, and if they’ve all shaped me so much, how much more could I grow by adding to that list of cities? How much could I learn and grow after three months in Madrid or six in Amsterdam or eight more in Mumbai or anywhere, really. The place isn’t as important as the people you meet there, the people who make you think and grow; think about yourself and your views and where you come from, where you're going, and who you are. 

You never fully appreciate home until you leave. This is true for America when I go to India or Nutley when I moved to D.C., and even for Madrid while I was in Italy. New isn’t always good but new definitely adds to you: how much you know, how deeply you think about certain things, how closely you hold certain parts of you to what you identify with. So yeah, travel is quite important to me. It always has been, and always will be. But right now? For the first time, I want to stop traveling.

When I first came to Spain, I was excited. I was grateful. On one particularly early and sleep-deprived morning, I cried because of how grateful I was to be here in Madrid, doing what I am. Grateful to my parents for making this possible in every sense of the word, but also to myself for valuing my desires and ambitions more than simply the progression of my career. For investing in myself wholly rather than in just a part of myself, as I would have been doing if I had chosen to intern somewhere this summer. (Hell, at one point I even shed a tear to a Drake song. But then again, if “Look What You’ve Done” doesn’t make you appreciate how far you’ve come or how far your family has come or how much your parents have done for you, then your soul is dead my friend. But I digress.)

But now I am tired. Maybe I’m jaded. I no longer fully appreciate every unique building, every sunset, every stroll through new streets and new neighborhoods. And that just isn’t me. The concept of gratitude and of appreciating every opportunity and every moment of beauty or happiness or peace is such a big part of who I am. One of my favorite quotes comes from a Kurt Vonnegut anecdote in which the author talks about his uncle Alex, who often made a point of stopping to say, “If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.” And that’s what I try to do, too. If these evenings in Madrid, if these views from long train rides, if these glasses of wine and conversations with strangers and new words learnt aren’t nice—then what is?

But somewhere along the line, I’ve lost that appreciation. I was talking to a friend back home and found myself complaining about how I didn’t want to travel anymore, not for a while at least. I need a break after this summer is over. I said to her, “After all, there are only so many cathedrals and museums and parks you can see.” And I stand by that, too. Too much of a good thing really is, well, too much. It gets old and mundane and tiring and you stop valuing it the way it deserves to be valued.

This past May, before leaving for Spain, I was talking to another friend about Madrid and Amsterdam, where I wanted to study abroad this coming spring semester. She had been to China the summer before and loved the experience. We got to talking about Europe and she spoke about how she didn’t feel the need to go there. She had been to Austria to visit family before and it was enough for her. I was confused. I had only been to Europe for the first time the summer before, to London, Paris, Brussels, Antwerp, and Amsterdam. I had loved it all and thought that she was being a bit unfair; in such a diverse continent how could one have had enough after visiting just one part of one country?

But now I see what she meant. The places I’ve been are definitely different from home, but only to an extent. I feel like I’ve learned so much here and I’m grateful for it all, but going to a few more countries and cities won’t do what I need it to. It won’t make me think differently or grow in any way, not when I’m as tired as I am. In a few years, when I go back, I’ll have grown and changed enough that the setting will be able to add to me. But at this point, it’s not going to make a difference.

(I’m trying to be careful here; I know Europe is a big place with an indescribable level of diversity and opportunity to grow and develop. The issue isn’t Europe here, it’s me and where I am right now: tired, weary, jaded, and in need of a break.)

At this point I’m reconsidering study abroad. At moments, I wonder if I even want to do it, which if you know me at all is insane. I’ve been looking forward to study abroad for eleven years, since my aunt spent six months in Australia and loved it beyond words. But even if I do study abroad (and I do think that I will), I’m reconsidering Europe. I’m reconsidering Amsterdam and instead I’m considering places across Africa and Asia, especially India. Being Indian-American is an enormous part of who I am and I think it would be incredible to live in the city where I was born, to reconnect with family that I would’ve been closer to, to explore the neighborhoods that would have been my own. I will never not be grateful for living where I am, for being Indian-American and for the people and places I call home. But sometimes I wonder. Would I still have the views and thoughts I do, be they religious, political, or otherwise, if I still lived in Mumbai? Who would be my friends? What would I think of the family I have in America? It would be amazing to go back, to live in the city that changes me and challenges me and teaches me so much every time I go back. 

I used to go to Bombay every other summer and at this point, it has been six years since my last visit. I celebrated my fourteenth birthday in India and as I inch closer and closer to twenty, it hurts to think about how long I’ve been away from one of the places I still consider home. India has changed enormously since I’ve been away, and there’s nothing weirder than returning to a place you call home and having it be drastically different. Regardless, I know I want to go back and I think to myself, if I don’t live there now, then when?

I still plan on visiting about four more cities this summer; it seems silly to not take advantage of being here and having my weekends free to explore Spain and Portugal. Coming here, I didn’t expect to want anything but Europe. And all those cities across this continent will remain on my wanderlist. But until I’m ready to explore them, until I’m at a place where I will be able to appreciate and enjoy them as much as I potentially can, I’m taking a break. And I’m reconsidering things that I thought to be true, which if you ask me, is one of the biggest benefits of travel anyway.

~ V

Week 5: Five Things I Learned This Week in Spain and Italy

{Venezia}

This week has been an absolute whirlwind. My mom and brother came to visit me in Spain and after two days in Madrid, we headed to Italy. I've wanted to come here since learning Italian in my fourth grade class so needless to say, I was pretty excited. We spent time in both Venice and Florence before coming to Rome and met up with some family and my mom's friend from college. As nice as it is traveling all over Italy, the heat and humidity here are even worse than Madrid and Mumbai, which I didn't realize was even possible. To make matters worse, Brussels Airlines lost my luggage between Madrid and Venice. They lost all my clothes, medicine, contact lenses and glasses, journal, and my DSLR camera. I still haven't gotten my bag back, nor have I received a response to any of my emails to Brussels Airlines, but I'm trying to stay positive and not let this ruin my vacation. Here's what I learned this week:

{my mom, brother, & me in Puerta de Sol}

1. The beauty of not understanding the language. While I still can't say I'm fluent in Spanish, I know enough to understand nearly everything people say, which is something I've definitely appreciated in Madrid. In comparison, my Italian is limited to what I learned in elementary school, so the only sentence I know is the most useless phrase, "Il lupo vive in una casa," which translates to, "the wolf lives in a house." Instead of being frustrated when I can't communicate with locals, I kind of enjoy just being able to appreciate the language from the outside looking in. Italian is so beautiful and has such a unique rhythm and flow and I love hearing it all around me.

{Firenze from up top}

2. Italian food is the best food. I'm cheating here, because growing up in Nutley, NJ means I've already had a huge appreciation for Italian food. Regardless, one of the best parts about being here in Italy is getting to eat amazing pizza, pasta, and gelato. I've been here for over a week now and have eaten gelato nearly every day, and if I could only eat one thing for the rest of my life, it would probably be pizza so I'm pretty damn happy here. The food is fantastic, and calories and carbs eaten abroad don't count.

{gelato in Firenze}

3. The value of comfortable shoes. I lost my comfy sneakers and favorite Birkenstocks since they were in my carry-on, and all I had was a cheap pair of black flats without any support. I spent four whole days wandering around Venice and Florence before I finally found a store that sold Birks and I swear to god my feet have never been so happy. Luckily, I found them before climbing the roughly 900 steps up both Giotto's Campanile and the Duomo... and then back down again.

{Burano}

4. What real wine tastes like. I had a glass of the best wine I've ever tasted in Venice and some delicious wine on a tour we took in the Chianti region as well. Needless to say, this is a huge break from what my friends and I are used to as poor college students and I enjoyed learning some new things.

{gondola}

5. I'm not good at dealing with heat. It is hot here. Very, very, very hot. I feel like as an English major I should have better words to describe how incredibly stifling this heat is but I don't. It's freaking hot all the time and the heat makes me cranky and I'm constantly sunburnt. This makes it a little harder to enjoy the Colosseum tours and wandering around the cities, but I keep reminding myself that I'm only in Italy for a short time. And again, a gelato in the afternoon always helps.

{Colosseo}

Tomorrow I'll be visiting Vatican City and then I'm off to Barcelona! Any recommendations? Let me know. :) Enjoy a few more pictures from my trip!

~ V

Read also: Week 1, Week 2, Week 3, Week 4

Week 4: Four Things I Learned This Week in Spain

This week has been incredibly fun and busy, and I think my decision to explore more of Madrid has paid off. I revisited the Reina Sofía, which is quickly becoming my favorite spot in the city, but also tried new restaurants and visited new neighborhoods. Here's what I learned this week:

{escaping the heat in Palacio de Cristal}

1. What 106 degrees really means. Temperatures this high mean feeling groggy, sleepy, and lethargic, which totally justifies the remedy of endless ice cream, cold drinks, and hours spent in the pool. Right?

{matcha ice cream with white chocolate chips at my new favorite place}

{Me and my friend Corrine in Puerta de Sol}

2. It's a small world, which means you may be lucky enough to spend a day in Madrid with someone you go to school with. As some of my au pair friends start leaving (I've already had to say three goodbyes), this is something to keep in mind. You never know who you might get to see again! :)

{photoception in Palacio de Cristal}

3. You can wholly and unironically be proud to be American. There are a lot of things that will distinguish you as an American abroad (including baseball caps, sneakers, the accent, talking too loudly on the metro, and saying you want a burger) but my personal favorite is that everyone in your country now legally has the right to get married. While there is more progress to be made, this is huge and it's definitely about time. I haven't felt homesick yet, but on Friday I really wished I was home visiting the White House and Supreme Court with all my friends in Washington, D.C.

{new piece at the Reina Sofía}

4. Horchata is delicious. As part of the #treatyoself lifestyle, I walked into La Mallorquina, an amazing bakery located in Sol, and bought myself a napolitano and horchata. While I have a serious sweet tooth, this was definitely too much sugar for even me. I'd never get the two together again, but I'm definitely going to enjoy horchata more often while I'm here in Spain. 

{napolitano de chocolate & horchata}

You may not hear from me for a while since I'm headed to Italy TOMORROW! My mom and brother are visiting me in Madrid and after a day in the city, we head off on a two-week trip to Venice, Florence, Rome, and then Barcelona. Can't wait to share the details with you all! Until then, enjoy a few more pictures from this week:

{view of Gran Vía}

{museum exploring}

{a #nofilter sunset from Templo de Debod}

{exhibition on gentrification in New York & D.C.}

~ V

Read also: Week 1, Week 2, Week 3

Week 2: Five Things I Learned This Week in Spain

This second week flew by so quickly. Every day was packed with new things to do: during the week, I visited el Museo Nacional del Prado for the first time and also got to explore two new neighborhoods, Chueca and la Latina. Then over the weekend, I spontaneously went to northern Spain with a new friend and visited León, Oviedo, and Gijón (new travels posts coming soon!). Here's what I learned this week:

{Plaza de Torros}

1. Exploring. This week has been a reminder that heading to the less-famous spots is sometimes the way to go. I finally wandered beyond Sol, where many of the au pairs often meet up, and found new neighborhoods, some cheap bars with good tapas, and the best view of the city I've seen yet. Likewise, the three cities I visited in the North aren't exactly the most popular tourist sites, and it was nice being able to escape the crowds for a while and see some lesser-known sights.

{admiring the buildings in La Latina}

{street art in la Latina}

2. The difference between alone and lonely. I went out exploring in Madrid by myself on Wednesday and really enjoyed being able to go where I wanted at my own pace. My plans with a friend fell through, so I walked around for a bit before exploring new neighborhoods. I got on the Metro and picked a random stop on the map and just went. I used to be really good at spending time by myself, but when I'm at home or at school, there's always someone around so alone time is more rare. I think it's important to have a good balance between introvert-extrovert and when I'm so far away from all my friends and family, it's nice to have a bit of space to enjoy time with myself.

{churros con chocolate from San Ginés}

3. Food. I came to Spain knowing that this trip was not going to be an endless food-venture; the country that prides itself in its jamón and seafood paella isn't exactly vegetarian-friendly. But I think I at some point this weekend I reached my breaking point. After all, there's only so much fruit, pastries, and tortillas de patata you can live on. Luckily, I found a vegetarian restaurant in Gijón and was able to enjoy just one meal on our trip that wasn't entirely white bread, fried potatoes, or fruit. And in about two weeks, I'll be able to eat all the authentic pizza, pasta, and gelato I desire when my family and I go to Italy.

{museum exploring}

{Catedral de La Almudena} 

4. Travel. With a five hour drive from Madrid to León, two hours from León to Oviedo, half an hour from Oviedo to Gijón, and seven and a half hours from Gijón to Madrid, I spent a lot of this weekend on ALSA busses, but I'm not complaining. For nearly all of the bus trips, we had decent wifi, ample leg room, and a trip that started and ended on time, which is much more than I can say for the Bolt Bus back home. 
Beyond that, while I haven't had the "traditional" hostel experience, complete with sharing a room with several strangers, I can now say I have experienced hostel life! Our hostels were easy to find online, fairly cheap, and centrally located in the cities we visited. I now feel much more confident planning my next trip around Spain.

{some greenery in Madrid}

5. Money. Compared to what I'm used to paying for lunch or drinks, everything here is so cheap! It's amazing to be able to get a beer, glass of wine, or full meal for the equivalent of a dollar. A new restaurant opened up in my neighborhood in DC and when I checked out their menu and saw a $7 sandwich I laughed; while this is a price I'm technically used to paying back home, I'd never pay more than 4€ here and in fact, I often pay just 1€.

All in all, it's been a busy week and I'm happy to be back in Madrid after a long weekend in the north. I found a quote somewhere that said, "Don't count the days; make the days count." While I can't help but do the former, I'm doing my best to make sure I do the latter as well. :) Have a good week!

~ V

Read also: Week 1

Au Pair Adventures

{Madrid}

      Last summer, my good friend Mansi went to Madrid as an au pair and ever since she excitedly told me about her plans to do so about a year and half ago, I have been thinking about doing the same. After endless months of trying to figure out my plans for the summer and general future, I am so incredibly excited to share with you guys that I am officially going to live in Madrid for twelve amazing weeks this summer! The tickets have been bought and everything, so I guess I can finally start letting myself believe that this is actually happening.

{one of my favorite quotes}

      Truth me told, this year has been pretty stressful for me. I seriously considered transferring out of my current university to a school five hours away, changed my major from Economics and Communication to English and Creative Writing with a minor in Film Studies, and generally just panicked in terms of all things related to my future. Since then, I've learned to better balance my life, and rather than focusing every decision I make on how it will impact my career, I now actively think about living in a more well-rounded way. I've learned to appreciate DC and GW more than I ever thought possible and for the first time in what seems like forever, I finally feel a sense of stability and excitement rather than pure, raw anxiety. I am so grateful to know where I am going to be for the next two years, and for that place to finally feel like home. And going to Madrid feels like the culmination of all of that. I am so proud of myself for letting myself enjoy my life and truly live it, rather than spending every moment focusing on improving my resume. And holy Yeezus, I am so. Damn. Excited. Here's a (short) list of my goals for this summer:

• Learn flamenco and salsa. I took salsa lessons one summer but that was about six years ago. Regardless, I absolutely loved it and consider it to be one of my favorite dance forms. Dance has always been a part of my life and I can't wait to get back into the groove of devoting my time to learning more about it.

• Become bilingual... or at least as close to bilingual as possible. I've now been taking Spanish classes for six years, with some breaks in between, and love the language so much. It has taught me so much about the languages I already know and I've become so interested in theory of linguistics. I plan on speaking Spanish every chance I get and working on perfecting that gorgeous Spanish accent.

• Practice photography. When I went to Europe last summer, I hardly knew how to use my camera. It's so disappointing to see my photos and notice how even if the composition has potential, the exposure is off. I feel like I've made improvements on my photography this year, and hopefully the photos I take this summer will reflect that.

• Blog! One of the benefits of having a blog is that I have an outlet to post photos and chronicle my adventures as they happen. I plan to post much more often than I have during this past school year and can't wait to look back on these posts of my memories in Madrid.

• Survive. Not get taken. Not get arrested circa Bridget Jones in Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason. Not get lost to the point where it stops being fun and starts getting scary. 

      At this point, after countless applications and interviews, I have found an incredible host family and purchased my plane tickets. I have an overly ambitious list of about twenty-five cities I plan to visit throughout Spain, Italy, and Portugal. My Pinterest boards on travel have never looked so good. The wanderlust bug has bit me hard you guys, and I. Can't. Wait. I can't wait to share these twelve weeks of my life with you through photos and posts. I can't wait to travel everywhere and immerse myself completely in the culture. I can't wait to let Spain form me and shape me and change me, the way that India does every time I visit, or even the way living in DC for the past two years has done.
      I am so incredibly grateful to my parents, for not only allowing me to live in Spain (read: not be with them at home this summer) but also understanding my passions and encouraging me to follow them. I feel so fortunate to have this opportunity and keep reminding myself to take a moment to step back and appreciate how amazing all of this is. I'm looking forward to seeing how these weeks pan out. 
      As always, feel free to ask me about any questions you may have. And please, let me know if you have any advice, tips, or recommendations for restaurants, sights to see, etc. To chronicle these au pair adventures, I will tag all related posts with "aupair." 
      ¡Hasta luego!

~ V

Photos courtesy of www.dailytriphack.com and The Fresh Exchange blog.